Hey I'm still alive. Yes I know I've been neglecting my writing lately. Oh man do I really have a lot that I want to say but this particular blog is for a specific thing. So I am going to jump right into it.
Over the years I've made some pretty terrible choices. My decision making has been questionable. I've gotten myself into some things that would probably make for a pretty damn funny book. Those little voices in my head and my gut feeling I never did very well at following them. I would give examples but I could potentially be here all night and I don't want to do that. Lets just say I knew what the outcome was going to be from certain situations and I went ahead and did them anyway. Things have changed a bit for me since I started my meditation. During my meditation sessions I tend to reflect what is going on in my life and yeah it does help me out a lot. Lately a lot of my decision making has been pretty good.
Now with that being said apparently a lot of people don't agree with a few things I am doing in my life. I'm being stupid, I'm being blind, I'm thinking with my penis, etc. Let me just say this as bluntly as possible. Fuck you. I understand that people supposedly care about me and they want me to make the right choices so I don't get hurt or whatever. What bothers the fuck out of me is hearing about group therapy sessions that were going on discussing some of my personal life behind my back. Seriously? What in the fuck? For one its my life and I'm going to do what I want. It is also nobody's business as to what I am doing. If I shared information with anybody it should of stayed between me and the person it was shared with. Apparently I trusted the wrong people. Go figure. If I made any bad decisions lately it would be trusting the wrong people. Anyway back to what I was saying. People apparently don't trust me or what I am doing lately. Thats wonderful. I don't need their approval. I know exactly what I am doing.
Let me elaborate on the I know what I'm doing part. I over analyze every aspect of my life. It is sorta annoying but I have to. I've been through so much shit over the years that I do have to stop and think for awhile about what I am doing. A lot of times I seek guidance through mediation and just praying at night time. Yes I pray and I do this every single night. Don't act so shocked by that statement. I believe I've talked about it in other blogs. So yeah anything that I do I'm normally not really impulsive and I think it through.
In closing. Seems like a lot of people don't agree or trust in what I'm doing. I find your lack of faith disturbing and again I know exactly what I'm doing.