the aliens must die

one of the craziest dreams i ever had was back in my teenage years. you know how you wake up after dreaming and you are like omg what the hell was that? well this one was definetly one of those dreams for me. its been a very long time since this dream occured but i am pretty sure i remember most of it. enjoy.

the world has been deviasted by alien invasion. most of mankind has been killed off. there are small resistance groups spread out throughout the world. i am leader of a small but descent resistance group. of course the group is unusual. pretty much all we do all day is sit around in this like underground bunker type place and have orgies and watch porn all day. i dont partake in the orgies of course but i have a very beautiful woman by my side. was my crush for quite a few years.

anyways we are all hanging out in our bunker. people are sitting around watching porn when one of the guys reports that alien creatures are nearby. i decide we should make a move and take them out. any time we fight against the aliens there is a risk of death. so i gather up a small strike force and we head up to try to take out some aliens.

they are patrolling the street up above the ground. so we hide in between this building. (im unsure if this is what actually was the setting but its pretty damn close) one of our guys goes a little bit too far and he makes a noise. he gets spotted and is killed on the spot. i give the signal to take them out. so we start firing back. a few of us drop in the battle but we manage to take out the group.

little did we know that this was a trap. while we fighting off these aliens some other aliens learned of our bunker and went in there. of course they didnt do harm to anyone but their mission was simple. they kidnapped my girlfriend and took her back to the mother ship. were we that much of a threat to the aliens? so we decide we should do a search and rescue mission to get her back.

this of course was a trap. the head alien knew of me and apparently i was pretty powerful and the trap was set so i would go aboard the mother ship and they would process me into this super alien being. me and a group of people make it aboard the mothership. its unclear how we managed that. everyone else who didnt come with were back in the bunker watching porn. the head alien knew we were. they did some kind of mind control thing to us. its like we totally went stupid and we would periodically say the words captain crunch. a few of the guys while under this weird mind control ended up falling down an elevator shaft to their death. somehow i managed to pinpoint what was mind controlling us, it was some alien or something and i killed it. i then make it to the main alien room and the head alien is there with my girlfriend. i tell it to release her and it refuses. instead it does some mind control thing to me and while im under the influence the alien then kills her. her body falls to the floor. the mind control breaks and i scream. i go to her corpse and hold her in my arms but she is dead. nothing i can do. the alien then says to me ill let you live if you let us turn you into an alien. reluctantly since i am really upset i agree. it tries some mind control thing on me again. i manage to block it somehow but i go along with it making it think it has control over me. by doing that it makes the alien vulnerable. then out of nowhere i manage to grab something and i chop its head off. (yeah well i did say this was a dream so its not clear how i just magically got something to kill it) with the head alien now dead all the other aliens will leave the planet.

afterwards im looked upon as a hero who saved the human race. we now focus on trying to rebuild and well repopulate which of course means...lots of sex. the dream ends with us celebrating in the bunker...watching porn of course. i of course i have another girlfriend now. chicks like the popular guys! though now instead of 1 girlfriend i have 3. everyone is happy cause the aliens are gone.

mmmk...lol. yeah while writing that whole thing i was laughing. the whole captain crunch thing made me crack up. seriously though this is an actual dream that i had one night. i dont remember all the details but i think i got the jist of it. anyways i hope people found this as funny as i did...and i still find it funny years later after i had it

1 comment:

  1. lulz xD captain crunch, and porn!!! <3 shit yeah, i want to be in an alien invasion!